Fred-6 pens nifty editorial for USA Today

I stayed in a Holiday Inn Express last night, and whenever I stay in such a place it gives me (for free) the opportunity to do something I otherwise never pay for: read a newspaper. USA Today, by circulation, is the largest newspaper in America and is as standard issue at a hotel as CNN is at an airport, sort of the news version of sound/fury/signifying nothing.

Anyway, after looking at the front page (summer gas costs, Michael Phelps, social media) I went to the inside-back page with the crazy assumption there would be lots of opinions about a) the debt-ceiling debate and b) summer heat. Also – wars? What wars? There a Donkey in office!

Instead, the shuttering of The News of the World means that every news outlet with Murdoch-envy is now on More Cowbell alert reporting and opining on NewsCorp and Rupert Murdoch, which explains yet again why 9 out of 10 readers of USA Today do so for free in hotels instead of paying for it.

Now, to the lede: “Obama: Go ‘big’ on debt deal” is the headline, and the byline reads “By President Obama,” and includes a non-posed photo of the POTUS, cropped. Weird – very weird, but not his doing. Anyway, looking at it I’m guessing it’s about 600 words and in it, one can find every single thing that is wrong with this POTUS’s approach to the debt ceiling, debt, cutting spending, raising taxes, etc:

  1. There are no details
  2. There are ample straw men
  3. There are no details
  4. There are no details
  5. There are no details

I think that about sums it up. For example:

“But over the last few months, I’ve also said that I’m willing to cut historic amounts of spending in order to reduce our long-term deficits. I’m willing to cut spending on domestic programs to the lowest level in  half century. I’m willing to cut defense spending by hundreds of billions of dollars. I’m willing to take on the rising costs of health care programs like Medicare and Medicaid, so we can meet our obligations to an aging population.”

Oh really?

Fred-6 says many things, so I’m sure he is – technically – not lying when he says he’s said he’s willing to cut historic amounts of domestic spending. Yet, if one bothers to pay attention to this debate on a daily basis (because I’m a masochist, I do to a degree), the POTUS has not outlined one – no, not one – specific spending cut he’s open to. Not one. Zero. Nada.

Instead, when Republicans come up with ideas, they are naturally accused of wanting to kill old people. Aside from being a heinous lie, its also Fred-6 Leadership defined: Have no ideas of your own, bitch about the ideas of others and mercilessly attack their motivations.

Fred-6 has not only not ended the war in Iraq (he campaigned that it would be drawn down and ended between 60 days and six months) and Afghanistan (he’s ending that one on a political timetable – August 2012 is when the big drawdown begins, even though every respected, apolitical military adviser he has that I’m aware of is firmly against this), he’s started US involvement in a third theater – Lybia – and fourth as well – Sudan, where unmanned drones are making strikes for reasons I’ve never gotten clear, mainly because no news outlets seem interested in reporting on it.

So – expanding aggressive military doctrine equals … hundreds of billions of dollars in cuts to military funding. Um, where’s the anti-war movement when you need it? Oh that’s right – there’s not an anti-war movement, just an anti-America movement.

Fred-6 continues, finally returning to his favorite glory hole for a vigorous round of public sucking:

“Before we stop funding clean energy research, we should ask oil companies and corporate jet owners to give up the tax breaks that other companies don’t get. Before we ask college students to pay more, we should ask hedge fund manages to stop paying taxes at a lower rate than their secretaries. Before we ask seniors to pay more for Medicare, we should ask people like me to give up tax breaks they don’t need and never asked for.”

Yep – oil companies and corporate jet owners. I like when it’s something he likes, it’s “clean energy” but when it’s something he hates, it’s “oil companies,” as though companies doing clean energy research have no interest in oil and vice-versa. Also – corporate jet owners, which Fred-6 is trying to make a Boxxy-esque meme at this point. Oh, and let’s not forget about college students paying more – how about, um, they don’t actually pay taxes, and if he’s talking about the cost of college, well, Pres. Professor, it’s not registered Rethuglicans jacking up those costs now, is it? What’d you carry the vote of college students/professors/administrators by, now? 90/10, something like that, right?

Fred-6 closes with tax hikes, which he calls “some new revenues,” because he’s a really good writer, I guess. He cites noted, frustrated Corporate Jet owner Warren Buffett and Bill “Some Guy Controls the Price of Oil” O’Reilly on this point. He says that this debate should be about just default, it should be about the chance to do something big.

Like the Obamacare the vast bulk of the country did not want.

The Stimumlus that hurt the economy, not helped it, that added a trillion to this debt.

The Donkey-controlled Senate, which has gone 813 days without approving a budge, even though they controlled the House for more than 600 of those days.

Think big – like using NASA for Islamic outreach while shuttering the shuttle program.

Think. Big. Brought to you buy Fred-6, the ultimate coup of marketing.

I’ll close with this – Fred-6 can do what he wants, but the GOP best be warned: every single House Republican that goes along with any kind of tax increase and an increase in the debt ceiling will be primaried, and most of them will lose. We did not give them the power they have to roll over and cave to this politically-weak and getting weaker POTUS.

This got nasty yesterday, as word leaked a deal was in the making that included limited “revenue increased” ie tax increased, and Rush Limbaugh talked about it for some time. Before it was all over, Speaker of the House Boehner ended up calling into the show, just to clarify that no such deal was in the works.


The GOP, right now, cannot do anything about the 47 percent of Americans who get government checks, or the 30 percent of Americans who would drown their children before not supporting Fred-6 in any of his endeavors. But they control the purse strings – the POTUS does not have the power to raise the debt ceiling on his own (nope, not even in the 14th, and let’s see if Fred-6 wants to lose at SCOTUS again), and he does not have control of the national bank account. That’s all House.

Deal with it.


About godsowncrunk
I'm King B, the originator of the Jellywhite lyrical style and god's own crunk.

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