Who should the GOP base get behind? [Hint: It ain’t Chris Christie]

I was settling in for the evening and getting ready to write a piece for the GOC when I clicked over to HotAir, which linked to this piece by Jeffrey A. Anderson. The piece begins:

At the approach of an election that’s likely America’s most important since 1864, many Republicans are acting as if they’re content to conduct tryouts for the jayvee. One wonders: where is the sense of urgency, the recognition of the acute need to get the best possible candidates into this defining presidential race?

The comparison with 1864 is not overwrought.  Then, victory in the Civil War, and hence the fate of the Union, hung in the balance. This time around, the fate of ObamaCare and, with it, the fate of limited government — not to mention fiscal solvency — hangs in the balance. Congressman Paul Ryan put it beautifully here.

I like Anderson’s sentiment, and as someone who’s been dwelling on and writing about this since the day Fred-6 was crowned, I’m not exactly new to the party. With that, I shall offer this nugget, and then continue until eyes are bleeding – mine or yours I’m not sure whose.

The nugget is this: in a piece spanning a thousand or so words about the GOP needing to field its varsity squad and get in the game, how serious can it be taken when there are exactly two words that everyone is waiting on before they make their move: “I’m in.” The words can’t come from anyone, but from none other than Sarah Palin. Anderson mentioned Palin one time in his piece, more/less as an afterthought.

Love her, hate her, be indifferent to her, doesn’t matter – until she makes her move, the rest of the field will wait. This is as it should be, as she’s made the first move on virtually every other important issue of the day as the rest of the field has bided its time, waiting for her.

Anderson, in an otherwise interesting piece, sees it differently. He likes Paul Ryan and Chris Christie.

Curious, no?


As the go-to Palin person among my peers, I get asked about whether or not she’s running on a relatively frequent basis, though less so than I used to. Why is that? Not about not being asked, but why is Palin keeping a low-profile when many Palinistas have hoped and prayed that February of 2011 was the month she’d make her move?

Here is my theory: like any mortal human being with a conscience, I think believe the Tucson shooting spooked her. Not the shooting itself, not the idiocy about her map having something to do with it, no, not any of that. I think the swiftness with which the media glommed onto the nuttiness of the Internet Left and ran with the idea that the shooter might have been inspired by Palin’s map, that she was suddenly complicit in murder, that she was at fault, I think that spooked her. It was as though all the worst parts of the Fall of 2008 returned with a vengeance, only without the good stuff that went with it. Once again, the media went wild with speculation about Palin, smearing her with grease that, frankly, did not exist.

The swiftness was one thing, but then there was the unfettered glee I sensed in the whole affair. As a long-time Palinista, I sensed it early and was reminded of the old Nazi canard about if Jews didn’t exist, the Nazis would have had to invent them. The same goes with Palin: until she explicitly states that she is not running, the dogs are salivating, waiting to tie her to anything negative. They burned down her church, they’ve stalked her children, they mock her youngest, they report any lie that sounds believable and/or plausible, and all because she is the only person who legitimately threatens the power of Fred-6 at this moment. When the shooting happened, it was as though the Left and their henchmen in the media wanted to send flowers to the shooter, thanking him for finally giving them something with which they could obliquely and without warrant attack Palin specifically, the Tea Party/talk radio in general, all while doing what they love: attempting to censor speech which is critical of any of the policies of the Democrat Party and Fred-6.

It worked. I can’t prove it, but I think Palin was within weeks (if not days) of announcing, and after the fallout from Tuscon, I think she took a step back. I don’t blame her. The thing about Palin, though, is that she never gives up (yes – insert your “quitter” joke here RE governorship). Palin, who has seen more lies and slander directed at her through the national media than any other political figure (including Bush 43 and Cheney), suddenly had to step back and ask: do I really want to put up with this? Even if I do, do I really want to put my family through this?

She knows that if she decides to run, the moment she does all hell will break loose, and it will not stop until she hands over the keys to the White House after her second term, and not a moment before. It’s a good job, but is it worth it?

FWIW, I want her to run and I want her to win. I don’t know if she will run, and I don’t think she will win if she does. I do think, however, that she gives us the best chance to win, which is the only thing that matters right now. If I thought someone else was better suited as a Conservative to run against Fred-6’s machine and win, then I’d be touting them. Unfortunately (save for Herman Cain), there is not.

There is the patently obvious, of course: if gas prices keep soaring and Palin returns to drill baby, drill, then all of the sudden, we might have us a horse race.


Here’s my thinking, and a more reasonable person who otherwise agrees with me politically will most likely not like said thinking: The GOP must field a candidate who will not only draw blood, but one who will do so on a daily basis. They cannot be scared of being called a racist (a bigger fear than I think most people realize among Conservative politicians, especially white male Conservative/GOP pols), and they cannot fall back on civility in the face of defeat.

Conservatives (and the GOP, since we’re stuck with each other, but I speak as a Conservative) not only want someone who will fight dirty, we deserve someone who will fight dirty. Everything should be fair game, and I mean everything. I don’t heed warnings about Pyrrhic victories – currently the Democrat Party is waging Total Warfare on the nation’s values and coffers, and the bloodier the battle, the better.

The GOP candidate’s operatives should be people like me who are not me: people who have zero fear of being among peers and strangers and openly questioning Fred-6’s intelligence, his grades in school, his employment history, his finances, his wife’s finances, his backers, his friends, his associates, everyone he’s worked for, everyone who has ever given him money and yes, his birth certificate. Furthermore, his supporters and acolytes should not be off limits – subversive interviews at Obama rallies conducted by people with Flip cams or hidden cams should be unfurled on z’toobs daily, demonstrating the ignorance the average supporter of Fred-6 has about their chosen candidate.

But B-Rex, even Sarah Palin says that’s a distraction and she doesn’t doubt his citizenship. I don’t either – that’s not the point. The point is that The Candidate does what’s good and right, but the campaign’s operatives must know that The Candidate understands that every single card in the political deck is on the table, and those cards are not recitations of talking points, they are – to be blunt – every provable, non-proveable, rumored, salacious bullet point in Fred-6’s biography. Remember, the mo-fo’s written two autobiographies, and I know few people who’ve read either of them, much less both of them. Also remember: the Left has thrown anything it thinks will stick at Sarah Palin, and whether it sticks or not, they keep on throwing.

Again: Total Warfware. They are winning this battle.

The larger point is simple: The Candidate will be representing half the country that despises Fred-6 with every fiber of their being, not because of his skin color, not because of his birth certificate, not because he’s a lawyer: we see a man who loathes this nation’s institutions, laws and traditions, and we want him taken down. We may not beat him, but we want someone who will wipe the condescending smile off his face and remove the photographic halo from behind his smug head. We need a fighter by proxy, not someone who will vacuum the red carpet leading to Fred-6’s second coronation.

[Enjoying all the hostile language? Intentional, of course. ‘—z’King]

Furthermore, he’s making the nation weaker in the realm of FoPo, and considering his first job is as Commander in Chief, this is not a good thing.

Who’s going to do that? Huckabee? Romney? T-Paw? No – none of them have the stones to do it, and none of them will be able to outspend Fred-6’s organization. It will take someone who has plenty of skin in the game, someone who loathes Fred-6 as much as he disdains the American public, someone who has tasted the heel of Hopenchange’s boot when its been repeatedly put on their throat.

It ain’t Newt, and it sure as hell isn’t Chris Christie no matter what the otherwise awesome Ann Coulter has to say.


Strategy has become a hobby of mine – why, I have no idea. Most of the book-learning I do any more deals specifically with strategy – theoretical and applied fwiw. If pressed, I think my recent craving for strategy has everything to do with the 2008 election and how badly the GOP blew it, and before I continue, allow me to say that revisionist history is for idiots.

Until John McCain stopped his campaign to deal with the so-called financial crisis, he led in the polls. He led in the polls after the GOP conventions, but more specifically he led the race the night that Sarah Palin gave her keynote. The McCain Campaign was operating off the simple assumption that a Veep nominee’s job is to do the dirtier work that is considered unseemly for The Candidate, and as is now clear, two-and-a-half years removed from Palin’s keynote, she did that job too well.

Sarah Palin didn’t write that speech, but she delivered it as flawlessly as any convention speech I’ve ever seen, and I’ve been watching them for more than 20 years. In an hour’s time, she took the McCain Campaign of life support and shot it into orbit, and for her work, they shuttered her away for several weeks, took away the use of her political instincts that got her where she was in the first place, and mishandled a rising political star as badly as has ever occurred in the modern political era.

What was it about that speech that so ignited the McCain Campaign and forever vilified Sarah Palin in the hearts and minds of the American Left? Regardless of what you remember or what you think you remember or what you think of Palin or Fred-6, regardless of all that, allow me this: as someone who’s been writing about Palin constantly since two months before she was picked by McCain, the moment that Palin referred to “those Styrofoam columns” was the precise, nearly existential moment, when the American Left realized that trouble was brewing.

What was it about that comment? Why would I pick that out of such a long speech?


The comment was more prescient than anyone could have imagined. While Obamatons were bathing in the glory of the absurd spectacle in Denver, Conservatives were laughing hysterically, both with incredulity and with more than a bit of fear. This man, this unknown, neophyte, left-wing man reading a Teleprompter had apparently brainwashed half the country. For people who were into it, it was no doubt a transformative moment; for the other half of us, it was “huh?”

Unlike the half of the nation that was sober at the time, they didn’t catch on to Fred-6’s amateur use of straw-men, his rhetorically lazy (and telling) repetition of the phrase let me be clear, his inability to speak with conviction to a camera off-prompter, and so on. For those of us who follow this stuff hourly, every day brought new material demonstrating that he was indeed Frederick the Sixth, the man who inspired the tale The Emperor’s New Clothes.

Speaking for myself, the Styrofoam columns represented everything that was horrid about Fred-6 as a man, a politician and a serious candidate who could possibly enter the Oval Office in a few months. The columns were so over the top, but that’s what his cult-like followers loved about him. The halo-pictures, the Helvetica-stamped posters, the pure marketing of the whole thing, it was flatly absurd. Seriously – it says more than most people care to admit that it was pretty much a given that any Toyota Prius on the road had a Fred-6 “O” sticker on the middle of the rear bumper cover. There are clichés, and then there are the tragically unaware.

In short, it had become apparent to many Conservatives who began paying attention that summer that Fred-6 was an empty suit at best. His affiliations with the unrepentant domestic terrorist William Ayers; the close relationship with his pastor of 20 years, Jeremiah Wright; his plucking from the Chicago Machine to make an astronomical ascension while his opponents always managed to bow out before the vote – all of it was troubling.

Then there was the man himself when he went off-prompter. More-funny-than-substantive gaffes like the 57 states laugher were one thing, but the reference to rural people as bitterly clinging to their guns and their religion with antipathy to those not like them, these were the eloquent words of a lifelong leftist, a community agitator and supreme narcissist.

It did not help that the media were completely in love with him – they still are. Newsweek, once a somewhat respectable news outlet, ran cover after cover with his picture on it. Time was much the same. I kept dozens of magazines with absurd claims about his potential, all in love with a man whose grades, transcripts, health records, etc had never been released. I still have the Esquire issue with Shepher Fairey’s iconic HOPE poster on the cover, blaring out the question “What Now.” What now, Esquire, was I quit subscribing to your magazine because of your ball-less support of this egomaniac.

Oh, as a love of Marlboro Ultra-Light 72s, I forgot: For Chrissake, he smokes!

Okay, what about those Styrofoam columns and Sarah Palin? What was the big deal?

Sarah Palin, who Christopher Hitchens termed a chillbilly, mounted  stage in front of thousands of people and a national audience, and for a few moments, gutted the balloon of hot air surrounding Fred-6 like just another fish. That she did it with such gusto was, in and of itself, perfect. That she did it, coming from where she did and representing what she still does, made it all the better. Fair or not, Sarah Palin became the de facto proxy for every person whose been looked down upon by someone like the great Hitchens and condescended as a chillbilly, redneck, religious fanatic, uneducated, undereducated, unsophisticated, poorly read, prole, white trash, blue collar, dirty huddled mass.

I am none of those things, but in the eyes of anyone who loves Fred-6 and his paper-thin credentials, I represent all of them. I’m so stupid I choose to live in flyover country – what else do you need to know? Here’s a hint: I’m not so stupid that I don’t know when I’m being made fun of, and neither is Sarah Palin.

Sarah Palin did not have an Ivy League education, she didn’t attend an elite Hawaiian Prep School or have a family tree that looked like the EKG of someone on crystal meth, she had none of that. She did not promise to made the waters recede, nor did she imply that she was a singular vision who the rest of us had been waiting for.

She was a mother, then a PTA member, then a school board member, then a city council member, then a mayor, then a state commissioner, then a failed gubernatorial candidate, then a successful gubernatorial candidate, and then she was tapped for Veep. She didn’t attend the right schools, know the right people, live in a fashionable neighborhood and her hands weren’t shiny-clean from years of not working for a living. Hitchens (whose work I love, fwiw), might have the writing talent of a poet, but no essay written from the ditches of Iraq or the hellhole of North Korea has ever had as much impact as a handful of Palin’s Facebook Notes, nor has his beautiful prose ever hit its intended mark so accurately as Palin’s oratory that night.

Wanna know why its’ Sarah’s game and everyone else is just watching? Because she’s the only GOPer with the sack to go after Fred-6, that’s why. She doesn’t just stick with policy – she has no issue mocking the man, and there is clearly nothing he hates more than being mocked. He is a little man in a big office, but don’t think for a second that his blood doesn’t boil with rage when he thinks someone has gotten the better of him – especially someone so crude as Sarah Palin.

I beg you, Palin-haters of the world: Please continue to call her stupid, and please continue to bray on and on and on some more about how intelligent Fred-6 is. Please, please, please keep it up. Even better, keep telling your friends you want her to be the nominee because she’s unelectable.

Keep telling yourself that, and maybe it will come true.


Here’s another question: why is it that Sarah Palin goes after Fred-6, while the rest of the potential GOP field and those who follow the un-started race are more content to go after Palin? Doesn’t make much sense, does it?

Chris Christie has had much fun giving unsolicited advice to Palin, and since Christie has shot to YouTube fame by berating teachers and other public sector union members at town halls in New Jersey, he is a GOP rockstar at the moment. Good for him. Ann Coulter’s in love with him, and Allah and Ace both seem to like the guy. And they’re just the A’s. Christie makes a lot of noise, but for a guy cleaning up New Jersey who’s not running for POTUS, he sure spends a lot of time in places that aren’t New Jersey talking about issues that, at best, are ancillary to New Jersey. Like Sarah Palin, for example.

Much was made of Palin’s jab at Christie on Fox News the other night. Some point to its randomness as evidence that it was rehearsed. I thought it was a mistake only in the sense that you shouldn’t punch down, and Christie, for all the love he’s currently getting, is beneath Palin when it comes to fighting the good fight. As is the rest of the field.

Newt’s taken some shots at her, as has Huck. Romney’s supporters love taking their shots, and even Rick Santorum made a rather strange comment about how she manages to raise all those chilluns. The good politicians know to punch up, not down, and Palin’s tactical flaw was a rare one. The point? All those guys punching up at Sarah Palin do so because they know they are beneath her, and the know that she can sink any or all of them whether she decides to run or not.


Finally, I’m in it to win it, and I’ll get behind whoever the GOP nominates. I do not want or need to be proven right about Palin – if Christie or Newt or Huck or T-Paw or Daniels or any of the others could win as a Conservative, that’s who I’d be for.

But most of them aren’t Conservative, and those who are can’t win. I don’t want to be stabbed in the back by a candidate who says all the right things at CPAC next February before going soft on everything from taxation to government spending to immigration to … you name it. Every last one of The Boring White Men are closet liberals, open pussies, dull as dirt, or a mixture of all three.

Sarah Palin’s none of those – I don’t know who the base will unite around but I know what I’m pulling for already: Palin/Cain ’12.





About godsowncrunk
I'm King B, the originator of the Jellywhite lyrical style and god's own crunk.

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