Big Important Piece of the Morning: Left-wing nutjob Elizabeth Wurtzel likes … Sarah Palin? Huh?

She’s right about one thing – liberal men are wimps. Every time I’m talking to a girlfriend with men problems, I already know the problem: she’s dating an unrepentant pussy who more than likely voted for Fred-6, listens to NPR and either has a well-trimmed beard or is thinking about growing one. And wears a satchel. And skinny jeans, on occasion. Also, I should note that I’ve had a weird crush on Wurtzel for ages – not because she used to be cute, but because she’s damaged in the Rayanne Graf from My So-Called Life way – anyway, read the whole thing, and check out JOM’s critique after it:

But it doesn’t matter.  It will never matter and I bet it never has mattered, because Sarah Palin is hot.  She has sex appeal.  That’s why people like her.  That’s the whole story.  Everyone has to stop trying to deconstruct and decode it, because there is no accounting for chemistry, and Sarah Palin has lots of it going on with her public.  I don’t think anyone knows or cares what in particular she stands for, other than some general conservative cache of principles, because they are in love with her.

The Democrats are total morons for not finding their own hot mama before the Republicans did so first, or maybe I should have left off the qualifiers and called it straight: the Democrats are just plain morons, at least where women are concerned.  The right wing, for whatever weird reason, has been much more receptive to outrageous and attractive female commentators who are varying degrees of insane or inane, but in any case are given a platform on Fox News and at their conservative confabs.  Look at how great life has been for Megyn Kelly and Laura Ingraham and the assorted lesser lights.  But there are no Democratic blondes, no riot grrrls on the progressive side of politics, no fun and fabulous women in the liberal scene who could pave the way for a Palin.  Yes, there are women who are successful in the Democratic party, but none of them are successful because of their feminine wiles, none of them have played up their sex appeal the way Palin has.  MSNBC’s female host is Rachel Maddow, who is completely good in all manner of ways that good can be good–but still I must ask: Where are the policy babes?

I know, I know: all of you are saying that it’s a good thing it’s like that, it’s a sign that liberals have integrity and blah blah blah. But I think you are kidding yourselves.  It’s a sign of another thing: that liberal men are wimps who can’t handle the hot potato that is a combination of feminine sexuality and female political brilliance.

Anyone with a sense of humor, a sense of fun, and a sense that women should be taken on their own terms really ought to like Palin. I mean, of course, you should hate her at the same time, but you should hope she is the beginning of revolution, grrrl style.

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About godsowncrunk
I'm King B, the originator of the Jellywhite lyrical style and god's own crunk.

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